Hand Carved

As if the NHS wasn’t under enough pressure a new medical emergency has arrived to make A&E even more crowded on a Saturday night.

This one has bugger all to do with trollied kids off their faces but relates to pre dinner party carnage whilst knocking out starters.

It turns out that preparing an avacado is trickier than heart surgery or crossing the M25 whilst blindfolded and pissed.

The Lancet has even given this debilitating injury a specific name – ‘avacado hand’, although ‘silly twat’ would surely be more appropriate


I like the odd avacado and I’m no Gordon Ramsey (except for the heavy and unnecessary use of expletives) but slicing a pear in half isn’t rocket science ffs! It’s not even rocket salad – although that does help to make it a really good starter to be fair.

I would think that Mrs Mayhem should promise to shove a few more bob the way of A & E as avacados are top fodder for Tory voters!

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