The Age Old Question

In a study by students across the United States a number of old blokes and Doris’ were asked what they wish they’d known when they were younger –

The survey turned up some unbelievably boring stuff frankly –

“I would have probably put more money away for later years”

“Watch your diet, a lot of exercise, keep your muscles going so if you fall on your butt you’re not going to crack your hip.”

“The most important thing when you want to have a happy retirement life is to have a good relationship with your spouse.”

They might just as well have interviewed my tortoise Alan!

If they’d asked me I would have given them a much more insightful and interesting bunch of answers –

First off, I’d have wanted to know the numbers for the Euro millions lottery when the jackpot was a whacking 160 million quid

Also that Leicester were going to surprise everyone by winning – the odds were about a zillion to one! For a few bob I could have picked up enough to cover a care home for myself – preferably one with hot and cold running Doris’ on site

Then I would have asked to know ahead of time about the bastard who late tackled me back in the 60s – the git who put me in Reading General for 4 weeks with a bleeding (sic) shattered ankle. Come to think of it I could also have used a heads up regarding all the other nobheads who treated me to, amongst other things, a broken jaw, smashed zygomatic arch, broken ribs, punctured lung, splintered nose (several of those) and all the other bastard things that reduced my playing days by a distance. If I’ve missed any out you can see them in the rather painful (sic & sick) ‘Getting Hurt’ post. I haven’t included the time Harro goaded me into going off piste down a sheer mountainside in Mirabel which resulted in my breaking and dislocating my shoulder – I accept that I was partly to blame for that one (although nowhere near as much as bloody Harro, obviously)

Finally I would like to have known that I was going to miss touch with that kick at Twickenham in the Middlesex 7s finals – it ended up with Richmond scoring the winning try – haunted me for years that one.

I bet you wish I’d never found that survey article don’t you – me too, as it happens!




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